What Is Your Approach: Force Faith or?

Faith – when it comes to your life, work, or even your relationships, is that your approach? As a leader, is faith your strategy?

Of course, a lot depends on the situation, but if I’m honest, all too often I fall square in the force category – applying excessive effort to get ‘er done!

It’s no secret that I’m a driven gal. It’s the way God has designed me, however trying to make something happen in my own power and not fully relying on Him isn’t what God had in mind when He knit me together.

Knowing my proclivity to work hard and push more is just one of the reasons I’ve chosen GENTLE as my One Word for this year! It’s been an invaluable journey of learning to do my part without all the extra pressure and forcing that wears me out and creates friction so far!

Force-Faith-Futile

It’s been my observation that humans approach to life (and so much more) is often to utilize force, rather than faith, or sometimes they fall into the futile category.

Here’s what I mean by the words I’ve chosen:

Force: To make something happen with great effort.

(Think pushing harder, doing more, striving or taking matters into your own hands.)

Faith: To do your part and trust God with the outcome.

(Faithfully and consistently engaging in obedient actions while simultaneously trusting God to show up in miraculous ways to do what you can’t.)

Futile: To apply minimal or inconsistent effort.

(Giving up, not really trying, and hoping that it all works out.)

A Silly Visual

Recently my forceful efforts got me into an embarrassing situation. Who would have thought that a simple quest to retrieve a plastic lid would serve to illustrate a lesson God had been showing me!

In order to rescue the lid that had fallen behind the bottom drawer in my kitchen cabinet, I literally forced my arm behind the drawer. Yes, forced!

I was successful – the lid was no longer missing! The only problem: my arm was stuck. Not just wiggle it a bit and it will come out kind of stuck – it was STUCK! And oh so painful too!

I tried multiple ways of nudging my arm loose and nothing worked!

By now the pain of my elbow being wedged between the drawer and the cabinet was nearly unbearable! Now it is funny, but in the moment it was not laughing matter!

In the end, my husband had to remove the drawer altogether to set me free.

The lesson learned:

Forcing your arm is counterproductive and unwise even if you get the lid! I have the now-green bruise to prove it!

Force creates FRICTION.

And the effort is also exhausting and frequently leads to painful consequences (remember my bruised elbow).

Faith produces FRUIT.

It requires less effort, more waiting, and the courage to keep moving forward in what feels unknown, uncertain, or impossible, but leads to results that far exceed what you could have made happen on your own.

Futile leads to being FRUIT-LESS.

It involves practically zero effort and gets practically zero rewards!

Biblical Examples

The Bible offers so many real life examples. As I have been chewing on this idea of Force-Faith-Futile, several stories came to mind.

Story #1: Abram & Sarai

God promised Abram and Sarai a son, but in the midst of waiting for that son, they took matters into their own hands. Rather than waiting for the son God promised, Sarai gave Abram her servant Hagar to be his wife. Together Abram and Hagar had a son, Ishmael.

The Friction: Sarai had much contempt for Hagar, I’m guessing friction with Abraham, and ultimately there was friction between Ishmael and Isaac, the son that ultimately fulfilled God’s promise.

(Genesis 16-18, 21)

Story #2: David & Bathsheba

David was a man after God’s own heart. He composed numerous songs of worship, courageously killed Goliath, was God’s pick for king, AND he took matters into his own hands. Caught up in his desire for Bathsheba, he not only committed adultery with her, but David also murdered her husband Uriah!

The Friction: David’s actions lead to a son with Bathsheba and the painful loss of that son. David’s sin was made public (what humiliation for a king!) and just like he took another man’s wife, his neighbor did the very same thing to him. After this forcing moment, conflict, violence, and murder ensued in David’s family. Friction!

(2 Samuel 11-12)

While these two stories may seem like drastic, forcing things in your own life will also lead to friction.

Here are a few Biblical stories that demonstrate great faith.

Story #3: Joseph

Joseph had dreams as a boy that implied that at some point his brothers would bow before him. Given the already precarious family dynamics with Joseph’s father favoring him, it would probably have been better if he had kept these dreams to himself. Because he didn’t, he enjoyed a bit of “friction” when his brother’s sold him for twenty pieces of silver.

Once sold into slavery, Joseph demonstrates remarkable faith in the midst of very difficult and unfair circumstances over and over again. A quick summary…

• • • Potiphar’s wife accuses Joseph of seducing her and is thrown into prison.
      The Fruit: Joseph’s faithful actions in prison earned him the opportunity to oversee the other prisoners.
    • Joseph accurately interprets the cupbearer and baker’s dreams while in prison, but they forget him despite promising to put in a good word for Joseph.

The Fruit: After two years Joseph is summoned to interpret Pharaoh’s dream concerning the famine.

• • • Joseph’s interpretation of the Pharaoh’s dream led to him becoming the prime minister of Egypt and coordinating the efforts to prepare for the famine that eventually preserved his father and brothers.

The Fruit: Many lives were spared including his own family members who were also given land to raise their sheep!

(Genesis 37-50)

Story #4: Hannah

Hannah, was Elkanah’s first wife. She had no children, while Elkanah’s second wife, Peninnah, had several children. Peninnah consistently taunted Hannah and highlighted the fact that she had no children. Many of you identify with her pain!

Year after year, Hannah faithfully cried out to God for a son – literally brought to tears and unable to eat she was so distraught.

The Fruit: By faithfully waiting and trusting God, Hannah had a son, Samuel. That son went on to become a godly man, priest, prophet and leader! And Hannah went on to have five more children!

(I Samuel 1-2)

What’s Underneath Forcing?

On the surface, forcing may appear very responsible, determined, or working extra hard. But in reality, underneath all the effort is fear.

Forcing narrows your focus, causing you to miss important details. It takes considerable energy, contributing to a less energized you. And it has a way of causing pain in the lives of those around you!

It doesn’t just lead to friction. It leads to frustration! Next time you find yourself experiencing friction or frustration it’s worth pondering what you might be trying to force.

What’s Underneath Faith?

In contrast to the fear and forcing, underneath faith is love! Yes, God’s deep and abiding love for you. When you know how loved you are by Him, accepting what is, exploring the options, and prayerfully moving forward is less challenging. You can let go of the outcome because you know God is big enough to handle whatever is before you.

From that loved place, you are able to press on and do your part, even when the fruit is nowhere in sight, because you know that God is working on your behalf behind the scenes.

And even though you are venturing into the unknown, and it feels uncertain, you know the One who is the same yesterday, today, and forever will see you through! Nothing is too hard for Him – He is the God of the impossible!

Where have you been forcing more than exercising faith? Have you been forcing something in your…

• Career?
• Leadership role?
• Work?
• Business?
• Circumstances?
• Parenting?
• Relationships?
• ___________?

Whatever it is, I urge you to be faithful and have faith! It is the happy middle! Forcing or believing its futile will get you where you want to be! Plus, remember my poor elbow? I want you to skip the bruises that come with forcing!

What changes would fuel and feed your faith?