The Super Sweet Thing About Stress
Stress gets a bad rap! In and of itself, stress is not a bad. In fact, the right amount of stress actually boosts brainpower, expands your potential, builds resiliency, fends off illness, increases creativity, and motivates. All desirable perks – wouldn’t you say?
If stress offers all those amazing benefits, why is it perceived in such a negative way? One reason for that perspective is that stress is often downplayed or minimized. In many people’s minds, what they are experiencing simply doesn’t qualify as stress until it is significant – extreme. By that time it’s having harmful effects!
That begs the question, why minimize stress? There are several reasons, including…
- Experiencing stressful situations for an extended period of time
- Believing or thinking you “should” be able to handle all that is before you
- Equating your value to what you do, so you to take on more than you have capacity for
- Growing up with significant stress – complex trauma
- Operating without boundaries or knowing your limits.
- Trying to keep up with someone else’s capacity
- Tuning into your stress level might mean having to make hard choices or changes
- A culture that praises productivity and being busy
- Trying to live up to your own expectations or the expectations of others
- Wanting to prove yourself and/or your competence
- Not wanting to admit you are overwhelmed or can’t handle life and/or work
- Being emotionally numb or disconnected from your emotions
Stress Proof Your Life
Another reason you might be experiencing more stress than necessary is because you haven’t stress-proofed your life. By that I mean consistently practicing habits that increase your capacity and enable you to face what come your way with greater ease – habits like…
- Exercising
- Eating a healthy diet
- Getting enough rest
- Managing your time well
- Maintaining margin in your life
- Spending time with God
- Setting boundaries
- Engaging in activities that energize you
- Regularly taking time to relax
- Not relying on alcohol, drugs, or other escapes
- Spending time with those you love
- Having community, a support system and/or coach
Healthy habits help prepare you to handle stress.
Stress & Success
What’s surprising is that stress plays a key role in your success. It provides the pressure you need to accomplish worthwhile and meaningful goals. Stress also increases your confidence, abilities, and potential.
Stress is the salt of life. A little bit of salt enhances the flavor of life. Too much salt overshadows the flavor of your food, makes it hard to enjoy the taste, and it makes you thirsty.
There are moments when life serves up some wildly stressful circumstances. However, the bulk of the time you are the source of the chronic stress in your life – the not good stress! You might not like hearing that, but it’s true!
Picture a frog being tossed into a cold pot of water and slowing coming to a boil. The shift in temperature is so gradual the frog doesn’t notice and ends up cooked! The stress in your life can be just like that. Before you know it, you are boiling with stress! In fact, when you have some down time, you may not even know what to do with yourself!
Here are just a few ways that you may be adding to the stress in your life:
- Being overly responsible – compensating for others
- Taking life too seriously – you need space to laugh!
- Consuming too much sugar and not enough fruits and veggies
- Procrastinating or always being late
- Not dealing with clutter
- Keeping your “to do” list in your head
- Ignoring stress
- Being disconnected from your feelings – repressed emotion creates anxiety!
- A frantically busy schedule
- The inability to say “no”
- Mismanaging money
- Meditating on the negative
- Always thinking the worst – catastrophic thinking
- FOMO
- Poor habits
- Exceeding your limits
In order to enjoy the positive benefits of stress you’ve got to…
1. Shift Your Thinking
When you break it down, stress is the result of your perceptions around the events in your life. The good news is that you have the ability to shift your perceptions. In fact, one study showed that stress is only harmful to your health if you believe it is!
What are your beliefs around stress? Do you believe that stress…
-
-
- Depletes your health and well-being
- Inhibits your ability to learn and grow
- Limits your performance and productivity
- Is harmful and should be avoided
-
Or do you believe that stress…
-
-
- Boosts your immune system
- Enables you to learn and grow
- Enhances your performance and productivity
- Is helpful to you – I’ve got this with God’s help
-
What you think about stress matters.
Are you feeling helpless or are you focusing on what’s in your control? Are you dwelling on the negative aspects of your life or the possibilities?
You compound stressful events when you replay or meditate on negative thoughts over and over again. You want to meditate on positive thoughts or, even better, scripture!
Healthy doses of stress, combined with activities that energize and relax you are a winning combination! A beautiful rhythm of work and rest like scripture urges us to embrace. Trouble ensues when that ratio is out of balance.
Stress is a part of life – it’s not going away this side of heaven. The more you keep your expectations in check (what you think you can do) and learn as you encounter challenges the less stress will negatively impact you.
Where does your thinking need to shift?
2. Prioritize
You can’t do everything, so learn to prioritize what’s most important. Beware! What seems most urgent isn’t always what’s most important! Feeling that everything has to happen now – that’s overwhelming!
Practically, what does prioritizing look like day to day?
-
-
- Identifying your “Top 3” priorities each day
- Re-prioritizing when something changes in your day
-
In light of your current goals and personal values what are your priorities in this season?
3. Embrace Your Limits
In the story of Goldilocks the Three Bears, Goldilocks encounters three chairs: one that was too hard, one that was too soft, and one that was just right!
In the same way, you may take on too much (which leads to excessive stress) or too little (not enough stress), but there is a “sweet spot” or a “just right” amount for you to take on. Do you know what that is?
That seems like an easy question, but your Fear Monster will urge you to take on more than you are truly able to. Admitting that is tough, so you limp along until you can’t bare it any longer!
However, if you accept your limits and operate within them, the less likely you are to feel extra stress.
What are your true limits?
4. Proactively Plan
There’s a lot involved in planning! First you must have a vision and/or goal. Then identify the action steps that need to be taken. Those action steps then need to be plotted out on your calendar and it’s essential to know which of those steps need to be taken today.
Finally, you must step back and evaluate your progress periodically so that you can adjust your goals, strategy, or timeline if needed.
As you proactively plan, take into consideration all that you have going on in life and be realistic about what you are able to accomplish – back to those limits!
What does your planning process look like? What do you need to do differently?
5. Get Support
In the midst of stressful situations, an outside perspective is invaluable. Whether that support comes from co-workers, friends, family, or a coach, it’s an essential part of keeping stress in check!
Support is more than other humans in your life, it’s also engaging in activities that make your heart happy. Those activities are even more necessary when stress mounts. In those moments, the temptation is to skip life giving activities because they take up too much time. However, if you engage in supportive activities, your ability to focus and handle what’s on your plate actually increases.
What support do you need to better manage the stress in your life?
Bottom-line
Pay attention! Are you aware of what creates stress for you? Is it leaving tasks to the last minute? The unexpected or unknown? Finances? Big goals or projects? Performing? Failing?
Stress is a reminder that you have people, work, and things in your life that you care about. The better you handle stress, the more enjoyable your life becomes.
Your relationship with stress is like any other relationship – it takes work and practice. And it’s worth the effort!
Be compassionate and treat yourself like you would a friend! Get acquainted with your personal “sweet spot” when it comes to stress. And remember you are always changing. The level of stress you were able to handle five years ago might be greater or less than you’re your “sweet spot” is today!
How are you harnessing the power of stress in your life?
I’ve got more for you!
18 Ways To Put The Kibosh On Stress
3 Reasons You Might Be Addicted To Stress
Solutions To Help You Stress Less
