The #1 Problem: Conflict


Technology and I have a precarious relationship; we are not always friends. Recently, my computer refused to play nice! After clicking on something, it was hard to tell whether I’d actually clicked in the object or if it was just taking it’s time to do its thing! Every day it got just a little bit slower until I spent more time waiting than working! Needless to say, that computer’s been replaced by a speedy new one and I’m not missing the old one even a little bit.

Technology is great until it isn’t! When it works, it’s magnificent. And when it doesn’t, it is beyond aggravating!

There’s no disputing that technology can be the source of some incredibly frustrating problems, however, most of the problems you and I encounter are not of the technical variety. By far, the bulk of our problems are relational! And those relational clashes are not limited to your personal life – they bleed into our work as well.

Add a little pressure – a deadline, quota, highly visible project, or a new position, and the chances of encountering conflict rises. Without healthy conflict resolution skills, small conflicts add up to big hurts. Before you know it you’re discouraged and distrustful and enjoying one misunderstanding after another. Not a fun way to do life!

And under pressure, your personality can shift in unexpected ways! Are you aware of how your personality reacts to pressure; your “hot buttons”? And imagine how beneficial it would be to know in advance what “hot buttons” might trigger others! And even more importantly…what would turn those undesirable clashes around?

Here’s some invaluable information to keep in mind:

Remember, the only person you can control is you.

Your personality is never an excuse for bad behavior. When you make the effort to manage yourself more effectively and deal with conflict it forces those around you to make changes as well.

More often than not, conflict happens with those that approach life in a way that’s opposite of your way. Interestingly enough, most married couples are opposites and there’s a good reason for that. You naturally desire in others what doesn’t come naturally to you. By marrying someone who is opposite of you, typically together you will encompass all four personality types resulting in a “whole” personality.

Opposites can prove to be quite beneficial to each other when trust is alive and well, and quite detrimental to each other when it’s missing. And it’s really no different in the workplace!

What role is your personality playing in your conflicts?

Marvae Eikanas

Marvae Eikanas is an author, entrepreneur, ICF certified coach, Career Direct Consultant, DISC consultant, and HBDI practitioner. She helps her coaching clients sharpen their skills, face their fears, eliminate funky mindsets, hone their habits, and cultivate clarity so they can THRIVE personally and professionally. Schedule a consultation with Marvae here.

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