Thrive In Your Beautiful Life & Work

To thrive in life and work is beautiful!

When I think of thriving, I can’t help but think of the many perennial plants I’ve carefully planted in my yard. Each spring, they begin peeking through the soil, growing gradually, and then bursting into colorful bloom. I love witnessing the entire process!

When you see someone who is “blooming,” you know it, although you may not have a clear way to articulate what you are observing.

And when you see someone who is floundering, that’s evident too. It’s like the plants in my yard that crumble under the stress of winter, the lack of water, or some pest in the garden that is not its friend.

The Key to Thriving

The soil in my yard is red and clay-like. Before anything will take root, or even be tempted to bloom, the soil must be worked thoroughly. Compost, lime, manure, and organic matter must be added, and then mixed in thoroughly. It’s a laborious, sweaty process, so it’s tempting to skip this step, but my precious plants suffer when I do!

Assuming I’ve made the effort to work the soil and plant the perennials in a location where they will get the ideal amount of sun, my plants are pretty darn likely to thrive. And if the squirrels and chipmunks don’t eat my sprinklers (and yes, they actually do that!) so that they get adequate water, they are sure to produce the beautiful blooms that bring me such joy.

The Soil of Your Life

Just like my red, uncooperative Tennessee soil, your life has been through some stuff that has compacted your soil and emptied it of necessary nutrients! In order for you to thrive, the clay clods will need to be broken up and a few “amendments” worked in. Plus some churning to ensure you are ready to plant.

As I mentioned, that is hard, sweaty work. Well, not literally, but it requires you to use muscles that perhaps haven’t been used recently, so it might feel a tad uncomfortable at first. It may even awaken some fears. That’s normal! I promise it does get easier. It’s worth the effort because unless you do the work, thriving will continue to elude you.

Two Extremes

What I’ve noticed in my own life, and in the lives of those I’ve worked with, is that when you aren’t ready to work the soil, you tend to yo-yo between two extremes. At one end of the spectrum you feel like you are drowning, like you are navigating life in quicksand!

In that place, what’s on your plate feels overwhelming – your life in general, the emotions you feel, the conflicts you encounter, etc. You feel like you aren’t enough or that you don’t matter (your Fear Monster at work!) and all that is before is too much!

At the other end of the spectrum you feel stuck, rigid, like everything takes an abundance of effort. I picture that end of the spectrum like cement. It’s solid; unchanging.

It’s that old all-or-nothing thinking rearing its head, again! Thriving doesn’t happen in either extreme – the quicksand or the cement. They aren’t the right environment for thriving. Thriving happens in the “happy middle” when you work the soil and carefully.

Sadly, my perennials don’t give hints of beauty before they bloom.

The same is true in your life. It takes effort and time before the blooms are visible!

In fact, along the way, new insights and awareness surface that may leave you feeling like you are going backwards rather than preparing to burst into bloom. Don’t be discouraged! Hang in there. Be patient. Keep up the happy healthy practices that ultimately yield the blooms you seek.

From Abstract to Action

Up to this point, I’ve painted a happy visual for you. I hope that visual remains planted in your mind.

I’m guessing you want some helpful actions to take, a concrete idea of what working your inner soil and planting looks like so you can experience the beauty of thriving!

1. Practice Taking Responsibility

Not taking responsibility for your own life is one sure-fire way to prevent yourself from thriving in your life, work, relationships, finances, and so on. You are the one in charge of your life – the one leading YOU!

Blaming, surrendering to circumstances, playing the victim, or giving up keeps you stuck.

There’s a mindset that keeps you from taking responsibility – a “fixed” mindset. It’s a belief that what is will always be, and there’s nothing you can do to change it. Remember that cement?

On the other hand, a “growth” mindset is characterized by seeing situations, positive or negative, as opportunities to learn and grow. There’s a natural curiosity about what is and a willingness to experiment because you see failure is just another chance to learn.

Recognizing your role in situations, what you can do, and taking steps to improve – that’s the beginning of taking ownership and a step towards tilling that soil.

2. Remember, Less is More!

Nothing zaps your energy, creativity, and zest for life like over-committing! Close cousins to over-committing: being frantically busy, hurrying, or lacking margin – all indicators that your Fear Monster is actively at work in your life. When your Fear Monster is in the driver’s seat you will…

• • • Lack of boundaries
    • Struggle to prioritize
    • Strive to be valuable
    • Resist relaxing

When you continually take on more and more, spread yourself thinner and thinner, you are essentially diluting your effectiveness! That’s not thriving! It’s more like drowning!

You can’t do it all, but you can accomplish a few amazing tasks and even more importantly show up in a way that it’s obvious you are thriving!

Pair down. Say no. Delegate and eliminate. Put your energy into what truly makes a difference.

3. Rest!

From the beginning, God instituted a weekly rhythm to life – work, work, work, work, work, work, then rest, along with the occasional vacation – an extended break from work.

I might be stepping on toes here, but working more than 8+ hours a day is counterproductive! It means that you are stealing time from other key areas of your life and I bet they are suffering.

Thriving isn’t about just being successful at work. In order to truly thrive, you must be flourishing in ALL areas of your life.

The flip side is also true. If you rest, rest, rest, rest, rest, rest, then work it won’t lead to thriving either.

When you follow the rhythm God established, it increases the odds thriving!

Work (Stress) + Rest = Growth

4. Do Hard Things

Thriving is about growing, and growing happens outside your comfort zone when you engage in activities that challenge you – the hard stuff!

Where in your life or work is there an opportunity to practice doing hard things?

5. Trust The Process

Being overly focused on results robs you of experiencing the joy along the way. What if you were to switch it up and intentionally make the process more delightful? How might that change how you show up?

Rather than focusing on results, enjoy the process. Trust the process. And find ways to improve the process. The results will follow!

6. Face Your Fears

Fear limits you. While everyone has fears, if you push through the fear, you will discover that fear isn’t so scary after all! Each time you face a fear, it gets easier!

Thriving – that’s on the other side of your fears.

7. Practice Gratitude

Whatever you focus on grows, so guess what happens when you dwell on the negative?  It’s common to lapse into meditating, ruminating, or recycling those negative thoughts which is draining!

What if instead you practiced gratitude? Made a conscious choice to meditate on what you are thankful for, and not just in the happy events, but in all events, because even in adversity there positives.

8. Do What You Love

Fear chokes out the very activities that are life-giving to you. What do you LOVE to do?

For me it’s time with family and friends, reading, puzzling, gardening, and being creative. I make a concerted effort to carve out a minimum of 30 minutes for these activities on daily basis.

When I let other activities edge out the activities that bring me joy, resentment builds, which doesn’t lead to thriving!

9. Heal

It’s essential that you take the time to heal those parts of you that have been wounded. When hurts, offenses, bitterness, regret, insecurities, heavy burdens, or grief are lingering, they will prevent you from thriving.

10. Don’t Go It Alone

We were created to be in relationship with God and others. Spending time with God daily makes a difference. And so does regularly engaging with the people in your life.

Leaders, professionals, and Type A folks tend to be lone rangers. Who might you team up with personally or professionally? Consider participating in a community of believers, a small group, mastermind, or book club; a group you can connect with on a reoccurring basis.

Ask for help! Seek out professionals to assist you, including a virtual assistant, coach, mentor, or counselor if you need to heal, etc.

I’m certain you want to THRIVE in your life and work just like I do! They key is preparing your soil and planting so that your life blooms in a beautiful way!

What’s your next step towards truly thriving?