Stop Hesitating and Let Go

playground rings-cr

What do you need to let go of? Is there something you are hesitating to release?

For there to be space for what’s better and potentially more valuable, you have to let go of what’s got your focus now.

Not long ago, my grands and I were enjoying a delightful day at a playground. All was well until Grammy decided to try out the monkey bars! A simple spontaneous moment turned into several weeks of shoulder pain!

In spite of my mishap, I remember navigating the monkey bars with ease as a child even though I was shorter than the average bird. Navigating the monkey bars required a certain level of strength, coordination, and determination.

With practice, I found a rhythm that allowed me to move from one end of the rings to the other. As my skills improved, the process of swinging from one monkey bar to the next became more fun. It also gave me a sense of confidence, not to mention I was tickled by my success!

Two Take-A-Ways

Successfully mastering the monkey bars required me to…

  • Let go! It was impossible to move forward on the rings without letting go, grabbing hold and repeating the process again and again.
  • With practice my skills improved and the process became easier.

You may find yourself clinging to something in your life or work right now. Until you are able to let go, you will remain stuck and unable to move forward.

Perhaps you recognize the gap between where you are now and where you want or need to be, but knowing what to let go of, or what to grab hold of – that’s not as clear.

Maybe you are at the very beginning of the rings, somewhere in the middle, or in clear view of the final ring. But yet you cling!

Are you clinging to…

  • Outdated missions, visions, or strategies?
  • Old processes, programs, or structures?
  • The way things have always been done?
  • A role or position that you’ve outgrown?
  • Old hurts, slights, or offenses?
  • Unhealthy relationships?
  • Stuff – clothes, furniture, trinkets, books, etc.?
  • Responsibilities?
  • Ideas?
  • Emotions or avoiding emotions?
  • Control?
  • Mindsets, beliefs, or thinking that aren’t serving you?

Until you are willing to let go, you will remain stuck.

If you continue to hang on to the old while trying to take on the new, you find yourself stretched beyond your capacity. It’s like hanging on tight to the first ring while simultaneously trying to grab the fifth or sixth ring. Not only are you stretched, but you are incapable of creating any momentum to move forward. In essence, you are stuck.

When you are consistently moving forward – that’s when growth happens. That’s also when you begin getting better results.

Letting go is an ending, and endings feel hard. But what if letting go is a brilliant new beginning?

Letting go affords you some amazing advantages because it…

1. Narrows Your Focus & Maximizes Your Efforts

Fear slyly convinces you to take on more and more. You might not even be aware of how it is silently driving you in the background. Before you know it, your plate is overflowing. You are spread too thin and you aren’t able to give anything the attention it deserves. As a result, the quality of your work suffers and joy evaporates.

Less really is more.

Success and making a difference is more likely when you limit your responsibilities and laser focus your efforts. That’s when you really make an impact.

Each time you take on something new, it’s important to consider what you might need to let go of so that you don’t inadvertently you dilute your efforts.

What are your strengths? Where will you apply them? What deserves you focus in this season? What do you need to let go of?

For You Entrepreneurs and Solopreneurs…

It’s tempting to want to appeal to the masses, to cast a wide net when it comes to your ideal client. Your big heart may even struggle with leaving certain people out.

I’ve wrestled with this myself. What if narrowing my coaching niche to leaders, professionals, and entrepreneurs causes me to miss out on potential coaching clients?

What I’ve discovered is that by making leaders, professionals, and entrepreneurs my target, I attract more of the type of clients that I’m ideally suited to coach. That’s win-win for everyone!

When I try to appeal to everyone, I actually appeal to very few. And I’ve discovered that even though I intentionally pursue leaders, professionals, and entrepreneurs, sometimes those that are facing chronic illness themselves or someone they care for are still drawn to me, as well as homeschoolers who simply see that I have those experiences in my background.

2. Lessens Your Stress

When you are unwilling to let go, it eventually adds up to too much and that equals stress.

Because making changes is uncomfortable and entails letting go, you hang on and the stress compounds. It’s exhausting. You become worn out and frazzled. And that’s not a happy place to be!

When you experience too much stress for too long, it ends up harming you in every area of life – physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, relationally, and more. It’s a vicious cycle.

Letting go is the ticket!

3. Boosts Curiosity & Creativity

One of the sweet perks to letting go and doing less is that you enjoy more margin in your life. With a little space in your life, you are able to breathe, reflect, process, and dream. Then you are able to be more curious and creative – two things that enhance whatever it is that you do!

4. Silences the Impostor Inside

I’m guessing that you want to make a difference. In order to do that, you are going to have to take some risks, try some new things, and makes some changes. Are you willing to let go of how you have always seen yourself and embrace the new you?

Here are just a few of the ways I see this playing out…

      • Moms stepping back into the marketplace or starting a business but can’t shake their mom role.
      • Leaders who have recently been promoted comparing themselves to more experienced leaders and are acutely aware of their lack of ability.
      • Those who have spent years studying and preparing for a role but when they land the job or start the business, they feel like a fake.

That’s impostor syndrome!

Despite your education, credentials, experience, strengths, or talents, you will continue to see yourself incapable of stepping into your new position and thriving.

If you are suffering from impostor syndrome, you are not alone. It’s a feeling everyone has at one time or another, so acknowledge the feeling and remember that no one is perfect – everyone is a work in progress, including the most experienced. Failing is just part of the process. Focus on who you want to be and keep on learning and growing from your mistakes.

You have experiences and qualities that enable you to bring a unique perspective to what you do, so don’t minimize what you have to offer!

Let go of the old you and welcome the new you!

Letting go is a process. It may be scary and sometimes a little sad. Keep in mind that what’s ahead may surpass what’s behind!

In the end, letting go is about making intentional choices, zeroing in on what matters most, and knowing your limits. Resist the temptation to hang on out of fear or insecurity. Don’t be afraid to enlist the help of a coach. You don’t have to navigate letting go alone!

If you want to operate at your best, you will want to learn how to let go. Doing less will enable you to accomplish more.

Some of us think holding on makes us strong, but sometimes it is letting go.
—Hermann Hesse

It hurts to let go, but sometimes it hurts more to hold on.
—Anonymous

There’s an opportune time to do things, a right time for everything on the earth:
…A right time to search and another to count your losses,
A right time to hold on and another to let go…
Ecclesiastes 3:1 & 6 (MSG)

The best is yet to come so what do you need to let go of?

Originally posted on 2/28/17, this post has been updated and revised just for you!

 

Marvae Eikanas

Marvae Eikanas is an author, entrepreneur, ICF certified coach, Career Direct Consultant, DISC consultant, and HBDI practitioner. She helps her coaching clients sharpen their skills, face their fears, eliminate funky mindsets, hone their habits, and cultivate clarity so they can THRIVE personally and professionally. Schedule a consultation with Marvae here.

2 Comments

  1. Michele on March 5, 2017 at 12:04 pm

    On Friday I felt that God spoke to me saying, “The reason you are holding on to a job that’s time has come to an end is that you are FEARFUL that I will not come through with something else. It is time to “Let it Go!” So, I gave my boss my notice. Just read your blog today. Confirmed my feelings. I’m ready and expectant for what God has in store for the Argue family.

    • Marvae on March 5, 2017 at 12:26 pm

      Wow! What a perfect example of letting go… especially since you are letting go in faith without a solution in view! I can’t wait to see how God honors your willingness to trust Him in this place. Praying for you!

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